No pictures, no posting; I'm so lame, I know. By golly, all I've been doing lately is figuring out how to take care of a miniature human, doing absurd amounts of laundry (this kid can really poop), and oh yeah, MOVING. With a TWO WEEK OLD. We're done, thankfully, although by "done" I mean "I know where my toothbrush and deodorant are and that's good enough for me because the baby is crying. Again."
Actually, moving wasn't that bad. We had a ton of friends and one sister to help us, and other than the fact that the baby was enraged by the inconvenience of it all and screamed for most of the day, it was probably the smoothest move I've ever experienced. Still, even with a pack of awesome people to help and plenty of time, I would not put Move With A Newborn on my list of things that I ever want to experience ever, ever again.
The main reason that the move wasn't so bad was that as stressful and difficult as it was, I was no longer breaking down and sobbing constantly. That passed on about day 12, and I've never been more relieved. The first 12 days post-partum were probably the worst few days of my life. It's awful that I'm describing the first days with my baby that way, and I feel guilty for even thinking it, but there it is. Way to go, evolution. Whose idea was it to mess with the hormones and brain chemicals of women who just gave birth? As if having an infant isn't difficult enough, Nature decides to go and take away all of your serotonin for a couple of weeks, too. Hey, Nature? I need that serotonin to feel happy. When you take it and most of my estrogen away in the space of a few hours, it makes me cry. And have horrible sweaty hot flashes. And have crushing anxiety that keeps me awake even though I had only been getting about 3 hours of sleep a night. I didn't even have real post-partum depression; that's way worse, and lasts for way longer. This was just the very typical "baby blues." I think I might have to strangle whoever came up with the name "baby blues." I'm starting a petition to rename it "The Horrible, Devastating, Crushing Time That You Think May Never End But Then It Does And Every Morning You Wake Up And Are Happy Again Is Like A Twenty That You Find In Your Old Jacket Pocket." Much better.
So anyway, the internet is back as of yesterday, so look for pictures of Evelyn's rapidly expanding cheeks soon. She's not kidding around. Those things could squash Detroit.