Friday, July 24, 2009

Somebody call me an agent, cause I have the next best-seller.

You'd be surprised at the lack of literature on disciplining your unborn child. Nothing on the internet, and the woman at the library was NOT helpful at all. You'd think I had asked her when the next meeting of the I Heart Hitler Club was.

But guess what, Baby? You've got a clever Mama, and just because it hasn't been done before, doesn't mean it never will be. Especially if you don't stop kicking that one monkey-scratchin' rib within the next 20 minutes. I've been more than patient. I know you don't have a lot to play with in there, nor a lot of room to move around, but guess what? That's a bone. It's a permanent fixture in my body. And no matter how many times you pummel it with your tiny little foot, it's not going anywhere.

So we can do this the hard way, or the easy way. You've got to ask yourself one question. "Do I feel lucky"?

Well, do ya, punk?

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