Sunday, August 16, 2009

The Practice Child


People sometimes ask if we think that Cash is going to be a problem when the baby comes. This is a perfectly reasonable question. Some dogs become overly protective of the baby, some dogs become jealous and act up with the addition of a new family member, and some dogs like to lick the delicious baby over and over again. Still... have you met our dog? He's the one who appears to be dead. Yeah, him, the one with his tongue sticking partway out of his mouth and the creepy half-open sleeping eyes.

The only things that cause him to react in a measurable way are either food or leash related, so we assumed that baby would be safe. We ran a test, though, to make sure. We found a sleep deprived couple with an almost-two-year-old, and invited them over for lunch. We would feed them quiche and vegetables from the farmer's market, and they would feed Cash their baby. They were okay with this; like I said, it was a two-year-old, and they needed rest.

The baby was really good with Cash, actually. She brought him all of his toys (and some other household items like coasters and decorative wooden horses) and plunked them down on various parts of his body, petted him gently (mostly not even in the eye!), tried to haul him around by the butt (she lost; he was about 4 times her size), and generally squeaked and was entranced by the huge furry creature that she was allowed to touch. As we had guessed, he kept an eye on her and the various presents that she was bringing him, but didn't do much more than sniff at her a few times. I'm pretty sure all bets would have been off if she had just been eating a cookie and was covered with deliciousness.

Honestly, though, he's been a huge help in preparing us for the baby. He's put us through pretty much everything that a new parent can expect. Waking us up throughout the night crying for no discernable reason? Check. Periodically refuses to eat? Check. Drooling uncontrollably? Check. Kept us up at night worrying about him? Check. Pee, poop, and vomit accidents? Check, check, and check. Despite all evidence to the contrary, is awesome and totally worth it? Check.

Thanks, Cashy-bear... you'll be our number one baby for at least a little while longer.

2 comments:

  1. I can vouch that the picture Elena posted is a real picture of our dog, who is still very much alive. I know that picture looks like that of a dead dog, but most of the time Cash does look like he's dead, or at least comatose.

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  2. I am telling you this not to freak you out, but because I thought it was hilarious. Maybe I just have a really sick sense of humor, but I read the other day that to a dog, a crying baby is a sick animal and that it is the dog's job to put that sick animal down. So I guess when the baby cries, you need to reassure the dog that the baby is okay and it is a good thing that it cries. I don't really buy it though, because when my guys hear a crying baby, they trying to lick it endlessly... in a comforting way, not in a getting it ready for roast kind of way.

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